User-agent: * Disallow: / ~*bean*~

~*bean*~

[ Thursday, April 29, 2004 ]

 

La arif.

What do you do when you see that tiny part of yourself and you don't like it? An inward sigh of relief. Or the realization that you're not upset. Or wishing for something else on the inside. Being unsatisfied. Judging others. Trying and trying to hold it back, but it still comes out. The expectations. The encouragement. Becoming consumed in it. Ashamed. Hours and hours of silent pleading to no avail.

Nafs.

It was more of an embarrassment than anything else. I didn't vote for myself on purpose. But I drove home mindlessly, without really knowing how I got there, burdened by my thoughts. Once alone, unable to contain the few tears hiding behind my well intentioned smiles and hugs. Not disappointed with the results, but with myself.

0 comments

0 Comments:

Post a Comment