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[ Wednesday, June 11, 2003 ]

 

Graduation Jitters

I had my hardest finals today-Psych and Eng. They weren�t too bad, but I have an A- in both classes and the finals can make or break my grades. I�ll find out how I scored on them tomorrow.

I am finally done with the graduation speech�at least as close to it as I can be. Of course, I keep telling myself that it�s finalized and then I add a little here and delete a little there. I guess I won�t really be done until Friday, when I deliver it in front of everyone. I�ve been trying to memorize the speech, because I know for a fact that no one wants to listen to a student who is speaking in a low voice and staring down at a paper in front of her. I really want everyone to listen to my message; insha Allah I�ll have the speech practically memorized in time. I�m kind of nervous.

I had my art final yesterday. We had to take an old work from this year and paint it on a small board using acrylic paint (acrylic paint=annoyance). I enlarged a portion of my face, including my right eye, from the self-portrait. It was my first time painting a person using acrylics, and it actually came out pretty realistic (hehe, maybe because I spent an extra hour on it), and I want to keep it, but Ms. Converse wants it as a keep-sake. She said that I have the original self-portrait. I decided I�ll let her have it after I take a picture of it.

Speaking of pictures, I got three packets of photos back today. I was so excited. The first roll ranges from the last student-led protest I went to, to the Open Space photos with my aunts. The second roll contains photos from Baccalaureate, and the third roll contains photos of me still dressed up in my graduation gown with my family.

Baccalaureate was on Sunday and it was fun. It made me realize just how little time I have left in high school. I was totally surprised when I got to sit onstage (since I�m speaking at graduation) and wear the special gold cloth/cord thing. Parisa�s speech was very well delivered, Mr. Cautero�s speech was really funny, and Ryan Bergez�s song was very moving. Apaji filmed everything on the new camcorder. Mr. Robbins wore his monk habit, as usual.

We got our yearbooks last Friday but I was too lazy to stand and wait in line, so I got mine during lunch on Monday. I used to obsess over yearbook signing and go for quantity rather than quality. Now, I guess I�m just not into the whole yearbook signing spirit. I decided that I only wanted people close to me to sign my yearbook, and I will only sign people�s yearbooks if they�re people who mean something to me. That doesn�t mean, however, that if someone asks to sign my yearbook, I won�t let her, or if someone asks me to sign her yearbook, I won�t. I�m not mean about it or anything; I�m just tired of it all. Twenty years from now, I don�t want to read what random people wrote; I want it all to be meaningful. I think I�m very bad at the signing thing though. I read what my friends wrote to me and it makes me want to cry. And then I think about what nonsense I wrote for them, and it makes me want to cry even more. Well, not really, I wouldn�t cry about that, but I sometimes wish that I would put a little more effort into writing in their yearbooks, especially when I want my yearbook to be filled with meaningful comments. I just can�t really express how much they all mean to me in words. I just hope that they realize it already. And a lot of times, I can�t really describe what makes me cherish their friendships; sometimes it�s all the small things that they do. Aww man, help me�I�m already getting all mushy!

In Psych today, I got back the letter I wrote to myself at the beginning of the year. I actually enjoyed reading it. It was mostly about family relationships and transitions. I was wondering where I would go for college and what I would study. And then about my crazy driving skills (or lack thereof).

Tomorrow�s our Calc final. Actually, since we already took the A.P. exam, we�re having a party instead. All we have to do is fill out surveys to critique Mrs. Horton�s teaching, and then we get to eat and watch movies. Hehehe, we�ve been doing that for the past week now. We�re almost done watching Donnie Darko, and I think someone is bringing The Breakfast Club, Bill and Ted�s Adventure, or some other movie. I already bought the chocolate cupcakes!

I�m so proud of myself�I sewed a whole new outfit yesterday for my graduation. Woohoo! I rock!

Ummy is stressing about the graduation party on Friday. I only call it a party because it entails food and about 11 families. I�m worried about seating at graduation. I don�t think the school will let me tape that many sheets to the bleachers! I still need to clean my room and vacuum. And order naan. And go shopping for teacups and other things (Chai is so overrated!). Alhamdulillah the Bobojis and Kaneeza Masiji will help with some of the cooking. Daddy still needs to hang up some of my paintings.

Anywayz, I�ve got a ton of things to get to. I�ll relax when graduation is behind me.

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